


Habits Of My Heart

by mrs_meloncholy



Category: Fullmetal Alchemist - All Media Types
Genre: AU, Alcohol, Flashbacks, M/M, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, porn with minor plot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-30
Updated: 2015-12-30
Packaged: 2018-05-10 10:14:42
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,171
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5581834
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mrs_meloncholy/pseuds/mrs_meloncholy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It was Al’s 18th birthday party. Ed should be happy and flaunting his little brother around saying, ‘look how amazing he is!’, not worrying about Mustang, who was a grown adult and could take care of himself. But sometimes you shouldn't have to take care of yourself.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Habits Of My Heart

**Author's Note:**

> SO to note before you read; this fic isn't technically finished, though it can easily be read on its own like this. Point being there's going to be more of this, but not necessarily another chapter, more like a semi-sequel. I did leave a bit of an open ending I think? But no cliffhanger because I can't stand that.  
> Anyway, I hope you like it!!

Celebrating was always fun, but when you’d just accomplished the one thing you spent years clawing and crawling towards, celebrating was downright _delightful_.

Edward Elric was 19, and his little brother was 18, and in the flesh, and happy, and the world was finally right again. He felt worlds away from the agony he’d endured for the past six years, and for the first time in his entire life, he had nothing to do.

It was an empowering feeling, in a way. It was a beautiful feeling too. He had nothing behind him, pressuring him to carry on; to put one foot in front of the other when everything else was shoving him to the ground. Now, the weight of the world was no longer on his shoulders, and he could do whatever he goddamn pleased. It had been years since he was able to stop and breathe, and think, and enjoy his days. Ed found it so easy to lose himself in his life now, and the drift from activity to activity was such a thrilling thing. He had  _ options _ . Options he never had, or allowed himself, before. He could sleep until noon, or spend his entire day walking around the city, or read until he didn’t know what day it was anymore. It was… nice.

To say the least.

It had been just over three months since the Promised day, and the world was settling in itself quite pleasantly. The military has bounced back, Fuhrer Grumman instituting new laws to prevent anything of the sort from happening again. Ed thought that was stupid though, because there was nothing anyone could do to stop it if someone made another homunculus, but it helped ease the mind of the citizens who all nearly died, so he figure it was good anyway. In the mix of things, his military contract was cut, and he was set free.

He didn’t spend long in Resembool relaxing with his brother. It was too boring for him there. Winry was getting ready to move Rush Valley and set up her own shop, and there was nothing way out East for him anymore. Pinako was retiring to Rush Valley with Winry, so there was nothing left. Before he boarded the last train from Resembool, he and Al set flowers on their mother’s grave and left with, for the first time, a happy goodbye.

It felt good to let go of that town. Edward would always be a country kid, and he’d always miss and love his mother, but the world was his now, and it was a waste to stay cooped up.

At the moment, it was July 22, and warm and sunny in North Central Park. It also happened to be Alphonse’ birthday.

So, to celebrate his little brother’s 18th birthday, and their moving to Central permanently, they were having a proper birthday party, to make up for all the ones they’d missed. It just so happened, Alphonse' birthday was a Saturday, so everyone from the office was able to show up too; including Riza. An important appearance considering Al's massive, enormous, ridiculous crush on her. Ed teased him at every opportunity, as a big brother should. But really, who was he to tease him, all things considered…

“Brother, do you think Peanut would let me put a leash on her?”

Ed looked over from where he was rolling up his sleeves, raising an eyebrow, “Why would you put a leash on a cat?”

“So she can come to the park with us.”

With a roll of his eyes, Ed finished rolling up the button up’s sleeves, “Alphonse, you have four cats, wouldn’t it be unfair to only bring that one?”

“ _ That one _ , has a name, Edward, and…” Al deliberated, glancing between the few cats he could see, “I guess you’re right, but one of these days I’ll get carriers and they’ll all come to the park with us!”

“And they’ll terrorize all the dogs there.” Ed muttered, heading out the door, keys in hand.

“You know Mrs. Addison’s dog had it coming, Ed! Besides, it’s not like Peanut killed him.”

“Yeah, yeah, let’s just go, we’ll probably be the last ones there.” He said, locking up their small apartment as Al bid the cat’s inside farewell through the window.

As they walked down the stairs towards their car, Al chided, “Only because you spent half an hour to get dressed, who’re you trying to impress, brother?”

Edward glared over at him, “No one, Al, I was getting cat food out of my fuckin’ shirt,” He grumbled, sliding into the driver’s seat, “Besides, who’re you to talk? You’ve been talking my ear off about Riza since you woke up.”

“I have not!” Ed glanced over with a deadpan stare, “The first thing I said to you was good morning,  _ then _ I asked if Riza was going to be there, that’s not since I woke up.”

Ed just smiled, driving down the road, “Maybe if you weren’t so obsessed with her, you’d have a girlfriend by now.”

“Stop being such an ass, brother, I am not obsessed with her.”

Edward raised an eyebrow, “What's with the potty mouth, Al?”

Al huffed a laugh, “Look who’s talking.”

Edward frowned, “I don’t curse more than necessary.”

“Yesterday you called a potted plant a motherfucker.”

“You’re not much better Alphonse, you called your burnt toast a son of a bitch!”

“I was having a bad day.”

“Excuses excuses…” Ed said with a sigh, and smirked as his brother smacked his arm.

“My point being,  _ brother _ , is that I am not obsessed with Riza.”

Edward nodded, turning on the last stretch of road before the park, “Obsessed? No, probably not.  _ In love _ , however-”

“You shut up! I’m not in love with anyone but Peanut, Milkshake, Arlo, and Badger-” 

“Why you named a  _ cat _ , Badger, I’ll never know…” 

“ _ And _ , you won’t bring up love at all for the rest of the day, brother, it’s too soon.”

Edward parked the car beside a familiar black military roadster, and got out with raised eyebrows, “Too soon? Al you’ve been on  _ one date _ , no shit it’s too soon.”

“Was cursing then really necessary?”

“Happy birthday you brat, now let’s go, it seems like a few people’re here. I asked Winry to set up some stuff…” Edward said looking around, and when his eyes hit the tall standing gazebo, he gasped.

By ‘set up some stuff’, he assumed she’d put out the cake and the food he’d ordered, but this… Winry really out did herself, “You two are finally here!” She squealed as they walked up, staring at the decorations, “Happy birthday, Al!”

“Thank you Winry. Did you do all of this yourself?” His little brother asked in surprise, “It looks great.”

Lights were strung up across the top of the gazebo with gold streamers and some balloons around. It would’ve been childish had there not been two bottles of wine on the long picnic table, which was covered in a table cloth, food spread around and presents at the end.

“No, not nearly, I had some help. I hope you don’t mind, but Paninya came over here with me, so she’s here,” Winry said, pointing through the crowd of familiar faces to Paninya, who was arguing about something with Havoc, “And we ran into some friends on the train, so they came with, I’ll introduce you to them later.”

“I don’t mind at all, thanks Winry, really.”

Winry smiled, and it quickly turned to a smirk, “Oh, and Riza showed up not too long ago.”

Al’s eyes widened comically before he turned on Ed with a glare, “You told Win?!” He accused, and Ed shrugged.

“She asked.”

Winry grinned, “It’s alright, Al, really! And I mean just look at her, if I didn’t have a girlfriend-”

“Yes, yes, I realize, now please no more speak of my personal life! It’s my birthday, you two have to be nice to me.” Al said, with a mock pout, and Ed pushed him towards the mingling people.

“Go let everyone say happy birthday, and then sneak some wine,” Alphonse grumbled something that sounded like ‘yeah, and poison my liver’, before he navigated the crowd of people with a smile. With him happy and a part of the party, Ed turned to Winry, “So who all’s here?”

“Oh, other than the four or five people I brought… well, a bunch of people from the University showed up and introduced themselves, Granny Pinako should be here soon, some other people from where Al used to work, and all of the people from the military office you worked with,” Winry said, as she scanned the people all hanging around, “Oh, except General Mustang.”

Ed raised an eyebrow, “Why’s he not here?”

Win shrugged, “I dunno, Riza just said he’d be here soon.” She explained, and caught sight of someone she knew talking to Al and smiled, “Oh, I have to introduce Alphonse to this guy, they’ll get along great! You enjoy the party too, Ed.”

He just smiled as Winry walked away with a small wave towards her friend. Looking around for Riza before Al had a chance to corner her. Not to make it sound like she didn’t like Alphonse, Ed was sure she did, his brother just had a way of drawing conversations out, especially when he liked someone.

“Hey Major,” Ed started with a smile, and Riza smiled back.

“Hello Edward, I was just going to say happy birthday to your brother.”

_ I’m sure that’ll make his day,  _ **_week_ ** _ even _ , “Cool, well, I was just wondering why General Bastard isn’t here yet?”

Her brown eyes flicked over his shoulder before her smile lifted a bit, “It seems he’s just arrived,” She said, making Edward turn around, to see the man in question walking with his hands in his pockets on the path towards the gazebo, “General Mustang hasn’t been feeling too well lately,” Riza began, and Ed looked back at her with a raised eyebrow, “I assume that’s why he’s late.”

“Is he sick or something?”

She pursed her lips a bit, “Not exactly,” She told him vaguely, and smiled, “I need to go say happy birthday, thank you for inviting me.”

Ed beamed, “Of course, Hawkeye, you were top of the list.”

She just smiled before heading towards the small circle of people crowding Alphonse. If it was Ed, he’d hate having so many people trying to talk to him at once, but Al thrived under attention. He was all bright smiles and easy laughs, where Ed would be stumbled replies and nervous shifts of his feet. In some ways, they were so different, but in other ways… it was as though Edward was talking to himself.

Glancing over, Ed saw Mustang setting a small gift box on the table, “Hey bastard.”

Roy looked over with a smirk, “What a lovely hello, Fullmetal.”

Ed grinned, “Yeah well, you’re late.” He said, noticing the dark circles under Mustang’s eyes, but that was the only thing that seemed off about him.

“Not too late, Hughes isn’t even here yet.”

His smile held, “That’s for a reason though,” He told him cryptically, and at the raised eyebrow, he went on, “Hughes is getting Al a special birthday present.”

“Am I allowed to know what?”

“I’m surprised he didn’t tell you, actually,” Ed said, leaning on one of the columns, “It’s actually half my present, and half his.”

Roy nodded, “So it’s expensive?”

“Not too expensive, but-” A loud bang cut him off, and while Ed saw confetti flying in the corner of his eye, he also saw Roy’s flinch and cringe as he shut his eyes tightly. More of them went off, and for a second he swore Mustang was going to collapse, but he was back to normal in the span of ten seconds, though that didn’t make Ed feel any better about it, “Hey, you alright?”

Roy nodded with a small smile, “Fine, just caught me off guard.” Which had to be a lie, because when was Roy Mustang ever off guard?

“Well if you wanna know, Hughes helped me get Al a car.”

That seemed to the trick as far as distracting Mustang from the party poppers that kept going off at random, and he raised his eyebrows, “Really? I’m surprised Maes didn’t tell me as well, that seems big.”

Edward shrugged, “I asked him not to tell anyone, though I didn’t expect that to extend to you.”

Roy smirked, “Wise.” A horn honked across the street, loud over the chatter of the party, and Mustang jumped, his eyes darting over a bit wide, and Ed was sure his heart was pounding just by the look on his face.

“Hey…” He started, and Roy glanced at him, “You sure you’re alright?”

Roy hesitated, “Yes, I’m fine, Fullmetal.” 

Ed frowned, “Well  _ Colonel _ , you don’t seem fine.”

Roy just smiled, “I assure you I am. I’d better go say hello to the birthday boy before Havoc gets him drunk.”

Edward smiled at that, not relieved in the slightest by Mustang’s assurances, but deciding to leave it, “My innocent baby brother would never drink.”

“Hm, we’ll see about that.”

Watching Roy walk off, Ed sighed, slumping back on the beam behind him.

It was Al’s 18th birthday party. Ed should be happy, and flaunting his little brother around saying ‘look how amazing he is!’, not worrying about Mustang, who was a grown adult and could take care of himself. Still, it was hard not to, especially after seeing him flinch at the sound of party poppers. He knew what the man was going through, and being here wouldn’t help, -if anything it'd make it worse. Now, Ed understood what Riza had meant when she said he hadn't been feeling well, though if she knew, then of course she’d make sure he was alright.

Pushing the thoughts aside, he put on a smile and walked around through the party. Winry found him immediately, and introduced him to the friends she’d brought from Rush Valley. Ed couldn’t remember their names, as he was a bit preoccupied with watching Mustang get surrounded by the girls from Al’s university, and making them all turn into blushing, stuttering,  _ swooning _ zombies. 

More and more people showed up, including Colonel Armstrong and his sister, which got Havoc away from pushing beers on Alphonse. Major Ross showed up with Lieutenant Brosh, as did Granny Pinako who needed Armstrong to get her present out of the car. Hughes, Gracia and Elicia also showed up, Elicia towing a brightly coloured gift bag and Hughes holding a small box. It was beginning to be an even bigger party than Ed expected, and through the masses of people lounging around the picnic tables and benches and trees, he lost track of Roy, and was dragged into a long conversation with a guy from Al’s university about the Polymath Alchemist’s recent article in the Journal of New Alchemical Medicine.

It was bullshit, but Jason here didn’t think so.

“...and any equivalency would be thrown out the door? That doesn’t make any sense. The only way a wound heals is through the regeneration of cells, there's no way you can make those without substance there already.” Ed argued, and the guy rolled his eyes.

“You can through the written DNA in surrounding cells!”

“That’s impossible!” Ed said, crossing his arms over his chest, “Alchemy doesn’t think for itself, you  _ can’t _ design something that thinks on it’s own. Besides, no wound just affects one set of cells, skin cells are different from fat cells, and all the other goddamn cells in your body. What’re you gonna write up a mile wide array just to heal a stab wound?”

When the guy opened his mouth to say something, Winry popped up, “Okay, debates over you two. Al’s gonna start opening some of the presents!” She said, and Jason walked away with a disgruntled sigh.

Edward pursed his lips, “Why’s Alphonse friends with that guy? He’s an idiot!”

Winry glared, “Not everyone can be some alchemy freak genius, Ed, and you should be nicer to Al’s friends.”

“I’ll be nice to his friends that aren’t stupid…” Ed muttered, and ignored Winry’s stronger glare to watch as everyone began singing happy birthday.

It was pretty loud, all the voices building as more and more people joined in. Havoc was completely off key, and drunkenly hanging off of Breda. Armstrong, as expected, was in tears, singing like he was in an opera. Even with the off pitch voices of the 25 or so people, Alphonse was beaming, sitting in front of a big cake, face lit up by the lights over head and the candles in front of him. It was late by now, nearly five, though the summer sun was far from set, and cast the sky in a warm sherbet swirl of colours.

This was Al’s first birthday in the flesh, and Edward was sure it was going great.

Looking around as the song came to an end, his eyes fell on Mustang, standing to the right of Hughes. The wine glass in his hand looked as though he hadn’t taken more than a sip, and even from eight feet away, Ed could see he was shaking a bit. Just then, Mustang seemed to notice, and set his glass down before he dropped it. Roy’s other hand was in a fist at his side, and despite the content looking smile on his face, Ed could see every emotion in the short rise and fall of his shoulders, and slight narrowing of his eyes. When he had gotten so good at reading past the man’s masks, he didn’t know.

Dipping back through the crowd, Ed shot his brother a smile as he blew out the candles and everyone clapped. Chatter started as he made his way towards Roy, seeing as Hughes was busy holding Elicia, and Riza was hovering around Al, too starry eyed to notice.

“Hey, bastard, you wanna go for a walk with me?” Ed started, making Roy look over as he stopped beside him.

“Right now?”

Ed raised an eyebrow, “Why not? The park’s huge, besides, Al won’t mind.”

Something like relief flickered through Roy’s eyes before he smiled, “Sure, if you say so.”

Edward just smiled, leading the way toward the small dirt path that made it’s way in loops around the big park. Before he was too far away, he glanced back at Al to see him looking over with raised eyebrows before breaking into a grin and turning back to the party. Whatever Al thought he was doing, he was far from the truth, which in honesty was good. Ed didn’t know where this concern was coming from, but it wasn’t a platonic sort of place, and it bugged him that Roy was feeling so noticeably anxious. He’d never seen the man so edgy and tense before, and the fact that he’d even noticed was enough to cause slight alarm.

“Is there a reason you’re luring me away from the party?” Roy began as they hit the tree line and continued down the path at an easy pace.

Ed shrugged, “You looked like you needed it, and so did I.” He answered, and put his hands in his pockets as Roy hummed in understanding.

“You realize I can handle myself, don’t you?”

Edward narrowed his eyes ahead of them, “Sometimes you shouldn’t have to,” He said, and let that sink in for a moment before saying, “I need a job.”

Roy raised an eyebrow at him, “Are you thinking of reenlisting?”

Ed shook his head, turning to the right as the trees got denser around them, “No, though Al thinks I should. I’m never going back to that though, took too fuckin’ much for me to get out.”

“You could get a civilian contract,” Ed raised an eyebrow, not having heard of that before, and Roy went on, “It’s not enacted yet, but there’s a new policy Grumman’s looking over to separate alchemists from the state. Some, those who want to stay enlisted, can, but others who were only in it for the certification can get a civilian contract.”

Ed smirked, “Did you come up with that?”

“As a matter of fact I did, with you and your brother in mind.”

He didn’t want to say anything too soon, he didn’t know if he wanted to be associated with the military at all yet, but it did pique his interest, “So how would that all work? Jobs and what not.”

This was what actually started their private confab, and must’ve been how Ed had lost track of time. Mustang began explaining the civilian contract, which sounded a lot like Ed’s last contract with the military only he had the ability to refuse jobs, and he didn’t have to work out of the command center. With this magical contract, came all the benefits a State Alchemist got, which included access to the military libraries, and a lot of other resources the military had at it’s disposal. In all honesty, it sounded too good to be true, but then again, Roy had designed the policy himself.

From there, Ed talked about alchemy, and Roy asked about Al, and the university, and for the first time since he’s known Roy, there wasn’t any arguing between them. Albeit, there was bickering, but it was all good natured, and Ed had to admit, he liked it. Mustang was funny, and smart, and easy to talk to, and the more Edward did, the further they got from the rest of the world, the more he realized Roy seemed a lot better. The tense set of his shoulders wasn’t gone, Ed hadn’t expected a simple distraction to work a miracle, but he did seem more… himself, even though he wasn’t acting quite like the smarmy bastard Ed usually knew.

As they walked along the path, sky darkening above them, Edward realized this might actually  _ be _ Roy Mustang. No masks for the other military Generals, and no aloof indifference and air of authority for subordinates, this was  _ him _ . Maybe not all the facets and quirks and details, but this was something at least Ed had never seen. Just the thought made him blush a bit, and he thought back to teasing Al about his crush on Riza.  _ I’m really not in a position to tease him, am I _ ? He thought, listening to Roy talk about some alchemical theory he’d began researching when he was Ed’s age,  _ No, I’m really, really not _ .

Edward stopped at a turn off, recognizing it in an instant, and tugged on Roy’s arm to lead him off the path, but not wanting to interrupt him. Mustang took the hint and followed him down a much smaller path through a denser part of the trees, talking all the while. Since they moved to Central, Ed had been here, this exact little turn off, at least a hundred times, and he was sure one day he’d find the pencil he’d lost here too. The path he’d helped to create landed them on a slightly secluded side of the long pond in the park, and at this time of day, it was beautiful. 

Mustang stopped talking, his eyes widening on the expanse of the dark pond, acting as a mirror and reflecting the colorful sky, “Wow… how’d you find this place?” He asked, forgetting what he had just been saying as he looked around.

Ed shrugged beside him, gold eyes scanning the far sides of the water, “I’ve been here a lot. Found this little place when I came here to read.”

Roy was looking at the ground, dark eyes searching through the random stones, “I imagine it’s nice to read here.”

Ed stood beside him once he realized what he was doing, “Yeah, it’s great,” He said, and picked up a slender, flat stone, throwing it at the perfect angle to watch it skid across the water. Mustang followed his lead, skipping the stone with ease. There was a loud crack from across the lake, and Roy’s eyes darted up to it, only to see someone cutting down a dangerously tall tree. With a little hesitation, and a sidelong glance, Ed went on to say, “You know, you don’t have to be so on guard with me here.”

Roy didn’t look over as his expression clouded with a cautious mask, “I’m not on guard, just a bit… distracted.”

Throwing another rock, Ed shrugged, “I was gonna say anxious.”

“I’m not anxious.” Roy denied, and Ed looked over with a raised eyebrow before his expression changed and he looked back to the water.

“You’re safe right now, you know.”

Mustang hesitated, “In what way?”

“I’m here,” Ed said without pause, glancing over to see Roy already looking at him, “I mean, I’d never let anything happen to you, so of course you’re safe,” He continued, and looked back at the pond as he added, “It’s yourself you gotta worry about.”

There wasn’t a reply, just the sound of a few short footsteps before Roy was kissing him. Edward’s eyes widened, but he couldn’t say he wasn’t at least hoping this would happen. His eyes fell shut after a second, and he cupped Roy’s face, his fingers feather light. The small sigh from Mustang was enough to make Ed deepen the kiss, and then he was being pushed back and pinned to a tree. Roy tasted like red wine and some sweet kind of spice Ed couldn’t place, though neither was a bad thing. He couldn’t say he’d never imagined this, but even in the boundless fantasy in his head, it wasn’t this good.

Soon, the kiss changed, heated with a certain edge of ardor, and made his heart jump with a soft moan in his throat. In the back of his mind, Ed couldn’t believe he was doing this, -his 14 year old self would be proud, that’s for sure. More consciously in his mind, he was just stunned at how good it felt. His tongue swirling around Roy’s before he bit his lip lightly. Ed had never liked kissing all that much, and the few times he went home with someone kissing wasn’t on the top of his to do list, but this was different. 

While it had started slow and gentle, the kiss had turned fervent, and strangely so; not losing a breath of the warm comfort that it had started with. Ed wrapped his arms around Roy’s neck in an attempt to bring him closer, and when his hands dipped to lift him up, Ed went willingly, his legs coming around Roy’s waist while he leaned most of his weight back on the tree. Ed breathed a small gasp when Roy pulled away to kiss down his neck, and tipping his head back with his eyes still shut, he smirked.

“This making you feel better?”

He could feel Roy smile against his collarbone where Ed suspected he was leaving a hickey, “Mmm, I’m not sure, might need some-” He paused as he kissed back up Edward’s neck, which made him moan, “-prolonged exposure.” His words hovered over Ed’s lips before he kissed him again.

This kiss was sweeter, and Edward’s eyelashes fluttered as he smiled into it. Roy kissed like the world around them didn’t exist, like all his steely focus was on Edward alone, and wasn’t that the point of this from the beginning? It was intoxicating, and on top of making his head spin, -which he admitted wasn’t from lack of oxygen-, it filled his chest with a pleasant sort of ache that he refused to believe had any underlying emotions tied into it. His lips moved in sync with Roy’s, and he could feel the older man’s heart beating against his chest in the best sort of way.

Just when Ed was about to pull away when someone cleared their throat not far away, “You sneak away from my birthday party to make out in the woods?” 

Ed jumped a bit, slipping to the ground and blushing, “Al, what’re you doing way out here?” He asked, noticing Riza at his brother’s side with a raised eyebrow directed at Roy.

“I was looking for you,” Al said, and then smiled, “Riza and I were going to leave actually.”

Smiling, Ed nodded, “Alright, well, you two have fun.”

“We will,” Al said, as Riza linked their arms with a small smile, “Will you be home later?”

Cheeks heated, Ed shrugged, “I dunno.” Even without looking at Roy, he could  _ feel _ the smirk radiating off of him, and it would’ve irritated Ed if it didn’t turn him on so much.

Riza pursed her lips in a way that made it clear she was holding back a smile, “Remember work tomorrow, sir, you have to be at the office by noon.”

When Ed glanced over, it confirmed he was right, and Roy was wearing a gorgeous smirk, “Yes, Hawkeye, I’ll be there.” He replied, and Ed grinned.

“C’mon, I need to tell Win thanks before she leaves.” He said, leading them all out towards the path.

It was strange; almost like a double date of sorts, but Ed mostly spoke to his brother about the party, and his present. The walk back was much shorter than the walk there, though his and Roy’s pace was slower than theirs now. About halfway, though he couldn’t remember exactly, Mustang held his hand and walked beside him with a slight smile to his lips. Riza must’ve had some wine, or she just really liked Alphonse, because she was laughing, and smiling more than she had in the years Ed had known her. That seemed about the most surprising thing about the day, in hindsight.

Once they reached the gazebo, about 20 or so minutes later, Riza and Al said goodbye and left, though the party seemed anything but over. From what Ed could tell only a few people he didn’t know had left, and the rest were all lounging around the gazebo, wine glasses and beers in hand, and friendly conversation drifted through the air. Havoc was drunk, as was Breda, and to Ed’s surprise, so was Denny, and they were all singing some song he’d never heard from where they sat in the grass.

It was late enough that there weren’t any other people around, and luckily for them, no kids. Al had cleared out all his presents, and Winry and Paninya were putting away some food, and throwing out the rest. Really, it should be him doing it, but he couldn’t say he  _ wanted _ to.

“Hey, Win, you know you don’t have to do this,” Ed said, as Roy began helping, “You already set all this stuff up.”

“I had a lot of help, Ed, and besides, you paid for it all,” Winry said, and smiling as some of her friends started to help. When Roy went to help Armstrong take down some lights, she smirked, “Saw you disappear with him, what’d you two do for so long?”

Ed glared, “Can’t you ever mind your own damn business?” He asked, though his words lacked any sort of bite.

Winry laughed, “So are you going home with him?” She asked wiggling her eyebrows.

“As a matter of fact, I am, now hurry up and let’s get this shit done already.” He said, though there really wasn’t much left to get done.

“Wow, you  _ and  _ Al are getting laid tonight.”

Edward rolled his eyes as Roy walked over, “My little brother is  _ not _ getting laid.”

“Oh, I doubt that,” Roy chimed in, putting a few stray beer bottles in the trash, “Riza was a bit tipsy.”

“Even more of a reason he wouldn’t be getting lucky.” 

Roy smirked, “Alphonse is a good young man, but Riza likes him, and she had two glasses of wine, which means it’d surprise me if they don’t have sex.”

Edward pouted, “My little brother is pure, and innocent, and will remain as such until he dies.”

Winry rolled her eyes dramatically, “Ed you lost your virginity when you were 14.”

“Win!”

“Really? That’s surprising, I hardly ever saw you hanging around anyone your own age.” Roy said, ignoring the fact Edward was bright red.

Ed opened his mouth to argue, but Win cut him to the chase, “Oh no, the guy wasn’t his age, he was  _ 19 _ .” She told Roy, who’s eyebrows rose while Ed glared at her.

“How the fuck do you know that?”

Winry shrugged as she folded the tablecloth, “Alphonse told me.”

“That little-”

“He’s quite a bit taller than you, Edward.” Roy interrupted with a smirk, which got him a death glare.

“You keep talking like that, and  _ you’re _ not gettin’ laid tonight.” Ed warned, though he knew it was an empty threat because there was no way he wasn’t going home with Roy Mustang, Central commands legendary playboy. He had to know if at least some of the rumours were true.

Roy seemed to know this as he smirked, and looked around, “Things seem about cleaned up here, don’t you think?”

“No, not at al-”

“Go on, Ed, I’ll finish up.” Winry said, pushing him towards Roy, which earned  _ her _ a death glare.

“Whatever,” He muttered, and grabbed Roy’s arm, “C’mon bastard, you’re driving.”

“Of course.”

 

They stumbled into Roy’s small house with their lips locked, greedy hands pushing clothes off as quick as they could. Ed tripped out of his boots, and pushed Roy’s jacket to the ground as they moved through the house together. He didn’t get much of a glance at the front of the house, but at the moment he was getting a very clear view of Roy’s hallway, his back pressed to the wall, and his arms around Mustang’s neck. When Roy bit his lip, Ed let out gasped moan, and tightened his legs around the man’s waist, feeling just how hard he was already.

With his tongue in Roy’s mouth and his fingers in soft black hair, Ed felt the world fade into the background, and any noise he might’ve heard fell on deaf ears. Mustang’s hands were on his hips, and then they were undoing the buttons of his shirt, and then they were in his hair, and all the while he never pulled away from the kiss. Ed swore he could get lost in the feel of Roy’s lips on his, and when the final button of his shirt was undone, Roy was carrying him to the bedroom, kicking the door open before Ed was laid on his back on the bed.

His chest rose and fell in quick pants as Roy kissed down his neck, past his collarbone and down. He swore the room was spinning, and was it a million degrees in here, or was that just him? Despite all of this, there was no apprehension, or hesitation, in any of his movements while he tossed Roy’s shirt somewhere to his left and helped him get his belt off. As soon as the leather belt was cast aside, Edward pulled Roy in for a kiss, something he was sure he’d never done in bed before, but kissing Roy was getting addicting.

Reaching down, Ed slipped his hand down Roy’s undone pants and relished the moan that tumbled from his lips, “Fuck, Ed…”

Ed kissed and nipped at his collarbone, determined to leave an equal amount of marks on Mustang as he left on him, all while pumping Roy’s hardening cock. Both actions elicited soft moans, and stuttered gasps that worked as well as anything to get Ed hard. In the back of his mind, he wondered if this was actually happening, or if it was all spinning in the head of his 14 year old self, and the past five years of his life had all been some complicated mess of a dream. Sometimes it felt like it, but then his pants were coming off, and there was no way he’d ever dreamed of it feeling this good.

“Oh, fuck,  _ Roy _ …” Ed moaned, his hand tangling in black hair as Roy licked up the length of his dick, paying special attention to the head before taking as much as he could down.

It left Edward breathless, and he arched just a bit before Roy pulled away and kissed all the way up to Ed’s lips, wasting no time to show Ed just how he tastes. That should gross him out, he should be pulling away, but somehow kissing Roy made up for it all. At some point there, they ended up under the blankets, and between the kiss, and Roy reaching towards the nightstand, Ed’s heart began to pound loud in his ears. When he ended up further on the bed, Roy produced a bottle of lube, settling between Ed’s legs.

To his surprise, Roy hesitated, “Are you sure?” He asked, and Ed nodded.

“Yeah bastard, hurry it up.” He said, and Roy smiled, flicking the bottle open as he pecked a kiss over Ed’s hips.

“As you wish.” He said, though it was more of a whisper of warm breath over Edward’s skin, and sent shivers up his spine.

Soon there was a finger inside him, and Ed let out a soft gasp, biting his lip as he forced himself to relax. This wasn’t his first time, and though it had been a while since the last time, it was easy to relax beneath Roy. He knew he should feel vulnerable and embarrassed, even if he was past any insecurities. He was completely naked, fully hard, and on the bed of his old commanding officer, yet, he didn’t feel nervous, or like he should cover up.

If anything, he felt safe.

“O-Oh fuck!” Ed moaned, back arching off the bed as Roy’s fingers, now two, just barely grazed his prostate. At the sign of encouragement, Roy sped up and angled just right in a way that had Edward’s head tossed back, leaving him a moaning, starry eyed mess, “R-Roy, fuck, more.”

“Not quite yet, love.” Roy said, before leaving a series of hickeys all over Ed’s hips and thighs.

Ignoring the warmth in his chest from the petname, Ed was about to protest, to argue that he was ready, when Roy added a third finger. His legs spread on their own, he refused to believe they shook, though he might have felt a tremble, and his hands gripped the sheets beneath him hard enough that in the back of his mind he had to remind himself not to rip them. Knowing Mustang they were probably ridiculously expensive.

“Goddamn, just fuck me.” Edward demanded, admitting there was a slight crack in his voice, but he blamed that on the fact he was getting much too close to coming, much too soon. Roy leaned up and kissed him, not pausing his skilled fingers for a second, but Ed pulled away, “Please, Roy, now.”

Roy smirked, and it made Ed want to roll his eyes, though the arrogance in it was well founded, “So this is how you make Edward Elric say please? I should’ve known.” He said, and retrieved a condom from the same drawer the lube had been in.

Whatever retort Ed was about to say was pushed aside as he watched Roy put on the condom with anticipation humming through him. Licking his lips, he ran his hands up Roy’s broad chest and felt him line himself up and push in slowly. His fingers gripped Roy’s shoulders as the man let out a moan and cursed under his breath, sliding in until his hips hit Ed’s thighs. It hurt, as it always did, but the edge of pain seemed to add to the pleasure. When Roy kissed him, Ed rolled his hips a bit, getting another expletive from Mustang’s sweet lips and damn how that turned him on so much.

“Fuck, Ed, you’re so tight…” Roy gasped, moving in drawn out thrusts.

Ed drew him in for a kiss, though it was chaste compared to their last, “Fuck me, Roy.” He whispered, his breath filling his chest in gasps that built the light headed swirl his mind was in.

Roy kissed him, biting his lip as he obliged, more than willing as he sped up. The stretch, the fill, and blinding pleasure every time he hit the wonderful spot inside of him; it all had Ed moaning, curses lacing his words, with Roy’s name scattered between. Of course, Mustang was not exempt from the immense pleasure, and his hands fisted the sheets on either side of Ed’s head in an attempt to gain some kind of control over his reactions, though he was failing beautifully. Every kiss was shaken with lust, every touch burning with a need for more. It was exponential. The more Ed got, the pleasure, the kisses, the skin on skin; the more he wanted.

A kiss was planted softly on his skin as Roy buried his face in Ed’s neck, licking and biting and leaving a dark hickey. Edward’s mismatched legs wrapped around his waist as sparks raced along his skin before short circuiting his head. He’d had sex before. Not many times, but a decent few, but never in all of his naivety did he think it could ever feel like this.

This was an ache in his bones, and stars before his eyes. This time, sex was more than a way to release, it was an experience, and for the first time, it didn’t feel forced and it didn’t feel rushed, it just felt good. Every trace of Roy’s hand down his side to his waist left a burning trail, and somewhere, it had to be far away, Ed wondered why he’d missed out on sex being this good for so long.

His fingernails ran down Roy’s back, and he tried to be gentle, to not to leave any sort of lasting scratch, but it was a futile effort. He arched, and bit his lip until he tasted blood, smothering his wanton moans as Mustang moved just a bit fast. Edward’s eyes opened to meet dark eyes, holding the gaze as his mouth fell open in a silent moan before words fell from his tongue.

“Fuck, Roy, fuck,  _ fuck Roy _ !” He moaned, pulling him down for a kiss as his legs tightened around his waist.

Roy broke the kiss with a gasp, “Oh god, love, you feel so good…”

Edward rolled his hips, and shut his eyes and his dick ached. As if reading his mind, Roy’s hand came to his hard cock and pumped, and the world could’ve burned around him and he wouldn’t have known anything but Roy’s quiet moans and his own stuttered gasps as he came. He came with a line of tears in his eyes, and stars in his head, his breath stolen when Roy kissed him, following suit with a string of curses as he lost all rhythm and fucked Ed hard and fast.

It admittedly took a moment for him to realize what had just happened, and by then, Mustang’s arms were wrapped around him, holding him close as they caught their breath. They kissed for a while, Ed couldn’t remember how long, and then they just laid there, at a loss for words, each other’s taste on their lips.

Roy peppered kisses all over his face which made Ed smile and run his fingers through dark hair, relishing in the afterglow. Roy rolled off of him with a deep breath, laying there for a second before entwining their fingers. Ed hesitated to say it, but then got angry at hypothetical-Roy who’d refuse as he rolled over to snuggle into Roy’s side, “I’m staying the night.” He said boldly, as Roy put his arm around him

“I had assumed.” He said, running his fingers up and down Ed’s side.

That, mixed with the sated feeling deep throughout his muscles had him drowsy and cozy in minutes. With Roy’s steady heartbeat beneath his ear, sleep came easy.

 

It hadn’t been that late when he’d fallen asleep. Maybe 8:30, though waking up  _ this _ early was still unusual. The sky was dark outside, Ed could see it through the dark brown curtains, and a dark morning in summer meant it was  _ early _ early. At first, he didn’t mind, content with going back to sleep, until he realized the bed he was in was empty beside him. Sitting up with bleary eyes, he looked around and saw his clothes scattered about, though still no sign of Mustang. The bedroom door was cracked, a sliver of light coming through which prodded at Ed’s worry and made him stand. Oh the aches he had.

He’d felt worse, and reached blindly for clothes, picking up his underwear and stepping into them before grabbing the closest shirt and throwing it on. As soon as his arm was pulled through the sleeve he realized it wasn’t his shirt, though that didn’t matter much to him as he treaded carefully through the house, though barefoot stealth was impossible with his automail.

Down the hall and past the living room came the kitchen, where the light was on. Ed almost missed Roy before he saw him sitting on the ground with a bottle of whiskey beside him. It was half gone, and worry flooded Edward’s mind as he froze, and Roy didn’t look up when he walked over, “Roy, are you alright?” He asked, and wished for once in his life that his voice wouldn’t scream the emotions inside him.

But of course, he wore his heart on his sleeve.

Mustang looked up, his eyes distant and his expression blank, “‘M fine, sorry.” He slurred, and held his head with one of his hands, arm propped on his raised knee, when Ed sat next to him.

“Are you sure?”

Roy hung his head at that, “No…”

“Come back to bed, you need to get some more sleep.”

Roy shook his head, “I-I can’t, Ed, I can’t-”

In an instant, Ed felt a bit sick, “Do you-do you regret it or something? Do you-”

“No, love, no, no, no,” Roy interrupted, shaking his head as he looked up, “I just…” Roy hesitated, and dropped his eyes again, “Flashbacks.”

While a bit relieved, Edward was still worried, “I know what it's like,” He said softly, and Roy glanced up, but after only a second, looked away, grabbing the whiskey bottle and taking a big drink, “Roy, it’s okay… if you want me to leave, or-”

“No, I don’t, ‘nd that’s th’goddamn problem,” Roy said, cutting him off again. Ed didn’t know what to say for a moment, but it seemed he didn’t need to reply, “I-I don’t bring people home, Ed. I don’t. I go, ‘nd I leave, but I don’t stay the night, ‘nd I don’t bring them home, because… because…” Roy’s eyes shut and he held his head, “Because I could wake up with my hands around their neck, or-or the curtains on fire, ‘nd I don’t wanna hurt you.”

Edward took the bottle from Roy’s hands when he lifted it to his lips, and stood, setting it on the counter, “C’mon, Roy, let’s go back to bed, you won’t hurt me.”

“I could…”

“No, you really couldn’t,” Ed argued, feeling a bit angry as he dragged Roy to his feet, “Do you know who I am? I’m the Fullmetal Alchemist goddamnit, and there’s not a pin you could put me in that I couldn’t get out of, and there’s certainly no way you’d set me on fire before I have your gloves in shreds on the floor.”

“Ed…”

“No, Roy, come back to bed.”

Mustang shook his head, looking away from him, “Please Ed, I don’t wanna hurt you, ‘nd I don’t want you t’see me like that, please.”

Edward rolled his eyes, “See you like that? Roy I saw you overwhelmed with rage because Hughes was in a coma no one thought he’d come out of and the man who’d caused it was in front of you, and I saw you after Truth stole your sight on the promised day, and I see you right now; drunk off your ass because you’re so fuckin’ stupid you think you would hurt me. You’re better than this. You’re better than thinking you have to protect me, especially from yourself.” 

Roy stared at him for a second before closing the space between them and kissing him. Of everything that was happening at the moment, that was the most unexpected, not to say it was unappreciated. Ed kissed back, wrapping his arms around Roy’s neck and drawing closer. When Roy pulled away, Ed laid his head on his chest, “Let’s go back to bed, Roy.”

“Ed…” He began, and Edward looked up at him in slight confusion at the strange, hesitant tone. But nothing he could see on Roy’s face gave away any clue as to what the man was thinking, “Never mind, let’s go to bed.”

 

**Author's Note:**

> Ok ok ok, so that was that, and there will be more!! I don't know when, but definitely not soon.  
> Thank's for reading


End file.
